Operation: Sharkfist/Mission: Ignition or How I learned to stop worrying about your feelings and love myself A.K.A My Master Plan

Fuck being succinct with titles! I am a convoluted person. I have a convoluted plan. It gets a convoluted title.

Can we start over? I’ve been gone so long, it’s like I’m new at this. I think this is as real as I’m ever going to get.

Hi! I’m The Jaded Gamer! The luckiest moron in the Universe. I’ve mostly been known for the various podcasts that I’ve done and the shenanigans I get up to along the way. I’m only down for a ridiculously silly random fun time and that’s all. . . Oh… and maybe play some co-op games together? (IamFN2K on PSN and XBL btw) but that’s it.

Audio broadcasting has always been fun for me and I definitely want to keep doing it. So I’m going to… but if you’ll indulge me… I want to tell you how I got here. If you’re new to the world of Jaded Gamer, feel free to skip paragraphs at your leisure…. if you’re one of my Savages, you’re going to want to try to absorb most of this.

I’ve never criticized the work of my friends. Even if I thought their product was garbage and boring, I never promoted it like it was. I would still call in or make guest appearances or do whatever to support my friends efforts because when it comes to entertainment, I always believe you encourage your peers. Even if that peer is a chickenshit who sits in booths at a comedy clubs because they don’t want the talent to make fun of them. Even if that peer can only talk trash on the internet and will duck you IRL so they never have to say it to your face. Even if that peer would invite me to co-op, go invisible and laugh at me with all the people I wish I could game with. . . I always encouraged them. Because that’s what you’re supposed to do.

If you want to break a man… that’s how you do it. Everybody always wonders why people snap. Taking deep breaths, ignoring those actions, exhaling and encouraging them to succeed kept me as sane. Kept me from snapping. I’m quick tempered but I am really good at apologizing swiftly. I’m kind of a fuck up sometimes and I’ve done my fair share of apologizing.

But I reached a real low point. I thought I had friends on this here internet and even though it’s obvious key friends are putting distance between me and them… I can’t flinch. I’m seen as unflappable. Unshakable. When it was obvious they just weren’t talking to me. I cried. Ok. It was one specific person who broke me. I just wanted to ask that one specific person, teary eyed “What did I do to you?” They were my favorite person. I don’t genuinely like many people. If I could lose all my online allies to keep that one, I would make the trade. I was just so sad.

Kicked from every crew, ridiculed by people I thought were friends, ignored, shunned, my podcasts folding, I just felt like a fail. I wasn’t though. I just wasn’t looking at all the downloads my podcasts were getting because I… I don’t know.

Anyways… I decided to forget about internet life for a while and focus on my real life. I needed to be a better boyfriend for my girl. That was number one. Next I had to get back into gaming. And now… get back to doing what was fun…

One Mic/Two Shows

Backlog Infinite is dead. Long live Backlog infinite. I think Wesker J is over podcasting. So, it’s safe to say that ship has sailed. I don’t hate that guy. He’s cool. He tolerated me and I appreciate his time.

Enter “Best. Game. Ev-er!” This is a similar idea. The approach will be much more scripted and possibly rehearsed. I’m going to use the first few episodes to get used to a format that works. This is the first time I’ve tried to do something that takes more effort than simply recording audio. Every episode aims to be an audio companion to play along side the game or a way to remember some of the biggest games without having to run through them again. I don’t know how long each episode will be or even if one game = one episode. This first game is sort of a test… and that game is…… drum roll! ….. Badadadadadada.. How do you indicate a drum roll in text? … anyways…. Tomb Raider 2013.. but it’s The Definitive Edition so the one from 2014. I’ll be releasing the first episode of Best Game Ever closer to Christmas or New Year’s Day. Yes I know that’s kinda far off… That’s why

Cult of Subtlety

Also a podcast. This one will be dropping sooner than later. I’m personally hoping to start pumping these out next week. But what is it? If you liked Rated J, stick around for that because THAT’S the place where I’ll be speaking my mind about … things… but at least for the initial episode there are people I need to thank and stories I need to tell.

The Cult of Subtlety is what I call my guilds whenever I’m allowed to create one in a game. Most of the time I lock the guild so it’s a cult of one. . Which makes it a very subtle cult, no other cult is as subtle as mine, therefore my cult is The Cult of Subtlety. And I’m opening the doors! So come listen to me do my best to hold your attention. Unlike Rated J, I will definitely talk about games every episode at some point. There will be monthly giveaways as soon as the listeners reach a decent amount. The prizes are also going to be legit. I wouldn’t gift you garbage I found at the Dollarama. That’s lame. I’m not going to lie to you. I’m lazy so I’m mostly going to gift stuff via Xbox Live and Humble Bundles because that’s so easy to do and really doesn’t involve you having to give me any sensitive information. (Let’s face it, I’m kind of a stranger to you) My listeners tend to be introverts as well so if you want anonymity AND prizes check out The Cult of Subtlety… coming soon!

Obviously these two shows are fine but I have domains to update. Thejadedgamer.ca will focus more on Playful Jaded Gamer related things as well as functioning as a personal blog. It will be another public link from me to you, not unlike the Facebook Pages.

Yourmommasbasement.com is Business Jaded. Although I don’t plan on “toning it down” for YMB I will make more of an attempt to not be so aggressively obnoxious around that site but I’m here to entertain. People know I’m just Forrest Gumping it through history… minus the AIDS baby… The point being that i’m a lovable idiot that’s kinda always around doing something accidentally significant.

Plus…. There just might be some synergy happening between me and another entity. I don’t want to spoil or get ahead of myself but when the ink dries… you’ll know.

Words cannot express the gratitude I owe some of you for following me this long. I see you. I probably know your name. You get VIP treatment in the Cult… GUILD!.. It’s a guild.

Back to work on what will be Best game ev-er.

Stay Jaded

J

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